Sunday, July 24, 2011

Season of the Locust

The other night I opened the back door to let the dogs outside for their evening jaunt before bed. The weather seemed pleasant enough so I stepped outside onto the back porch with Abbie while Benny and Chloe meandered through the grass.

Out of nowhere I immediately began to hear this buzzing noise which could only mean one thing. It's summertime and locusts are abundant. Abbie was quickly upon the buzzing locust nudging it with her nose as it moved to the left and right. I realized I had stepped too close to the locust and before I knew it the bug launched itself into the air at the porch light.

Much to my horror it began to dive bomb me as I jumped around the back patio in my PJ's with my arms covering my head. The locust had no sense of direction and continued bouncing into my head. I have no idea how loud I was yelling but awkwardly made my way to the door and jumped inside.

The dogs didn't seem to mind the buzzing locust as much as I so I let them in one at a time when the coast was clear.

Sunday, July 17, 2011

Lift Off

I was out to lunch with the family today at a favorite burger place. We enjoyed our dinner over lively conversation, paid our tab and prepared to depart.

It's summertime and things tend to stick so as soon as I stood up from my chair I immediately set to work making sure my outfit was still in order, skirt pulled down, blouse tucked in and so on. A woman can never be too careful when it comes to this sort of thing.

Upon standing I quickly ran my hands down the back of my skirt to make sure it was pulled down where it was supposed to be. Everything felt in order so I then moved on to checking the waistline, making sure my skirt wasn't twisted in some weird fashion and my blouse was still tucked in.

Amidst all the quick hand action of making sure I was in order I ran my hands down the length of my skirt once more and realized I had made a hasty mistake. My skirt was slightly bunched up in the back. I believe the panicked words flying out of my mouth were, "Oh my goodness!" as I reached a hand behind me to cover my rear. I was still facing the table when I realized this and immediately spun around to see if anyone sitting behind me had seen something they shouldn't have, all the while grabbing my skirt in the back and pulling it down while saying "Oh my goodness" once again. As I turned around I immediately made eye contact with an older gentleman sitting behind us. He held my gaze with a jolly look in his eyes while his wife sat across from him. He was wearing a grin as he looked at me and I was horrified to think of what I must have looked like.

All I could do was smile apologetically at the poor man. By then my family had all stood up, not knowing what had just happened and trailed behind me as we left our table. I tried to whisper to my mom what had just happened as I cast a glance over my shoulder after walking by and I saw the wife smiling at something her husband told her, noticing also that she was looking in my direction. I wanted to bolt!

I told my family what happened as soon as we walked out the door of the restaurant and my mom said, "Oh, is that why that couple was laughing as we walked by?" Pahhhhh!

Saturday, July 9, 2011

A Feel Good Story

This evening my husband and I were parched and sweaty from being outside in this horrid heat. (Guess that's to be expected when you live in a desert.) We decided to climb in the truck and hit the road to the Circle K, all of 3 blocks. On our way there we passed an older gentleman taking a seat on a fence in the shade. He looked to be heading home with his grocery bag in one hand and his cane in the other.

After getting our drinks and jumping back in the truck we began our short drive home. As we passed down Main Street we noticed that the older man had resumed his walk and was shuffling his feet down the sidewalk. He went about 30 feet and then had to stop for another break.

My husband and I both felt the same as we looked at each other. We turned the truck around and headed back to the gentleman. We pulled up to the curb and I rolled my window down as I offered him a ride home. The giant of a man climbed in with his 6 pack of Coca-Cola and his overly tall cane. At the rate he was walking it would have taken him another hour to get home.

We might have made his night by getting him home faster and more safely, but in all honesty...... he made MY night. :)

Smack Dab

The other day I got hit smack dab in the forehead by a cricket that came sailing out of the AC vent when I turned it on.

This morning when it was turned off I noticed a pair of cricket legs sticking out of the vent. When I went to turn on the vent I made sure I was out of the firing range from any objects that might come sailing out of the AC. As soon as I turned it on the crispy cricket came flying out. Even though I knew it was coming it still made me jump out of the way and into the dresser.

This has got to stop.