There's a book titled "The Ant Bully" and it's a story about a boy who terrorizes the ants in his yard. Ever heard of it? By the end of the story though, the boy realizes the fault in his ways and makes the decision to be nice to the ants and leave them be. It's a great story and all, but in MY little world I tell you, it's the other way around! The ants find ways of terrorizing ME!
My latest ant story came while we were out hiking yesterday. Two of my friends and I started to hike up to the next ridge on the trail while a few others waited behind. We hadn't even cleared 20 feet from where the others were standing when I felt a terrible pain in my side......like something was BITING me! I grabbed my side and as I didn't see anything on my shirt I immediately lifted my shirt and I was horrified at what I saw. There, clinging to my side, was a huge black ant with wings, all curled up and gnarly looking, taking a bite out of me! All my senses went on alert and I nearly panicked while trying to shoo him out from under there. I was half expecting myself to go skipping off the side of the trail as I danced around trying to rid myself of the ant. I thought I'd flung him far away but as the pain still continued I realized he was still there. I lifted my shirt a second time and sent him flying for good while tenderly clutching my side, hahaha. No stowaways allowed.
How he got under there I'll never know, but I am beginning to lose my patience with these ant bullies. Don't let them fool you.........
And yes, I apologized to the girls for showing so much skin, but it was a mad dash to save my own hide from the attack...............of one little ant. Pahhhhhh!
Sunday, September 28, 2008
Commercial Quality
I was out enjoying dinner with my sister and two friends last night and we were having a grand time over dinner. Anywho, I decided to start munching on the large slice of pickle that was served with my meal. I was thoroughly enjoying it when my sister noticed I was smiling at her (probably from being in pickle heaven) and she asked me why I was staring at her with a smile on my face. I said in an awe-filled voice, "This pickle is SO crunchy! It MUST be a Vlasic!" I couldn't get over how crunchy the pickle was! I followed that up with a huge smile and a look of pure enjoyment on my face as I took another bite of delicious pickle. At that point, the table burst into laughter and my sister told me that I should be the poster child for the Vlasic commercials. Talk about talent!
The laughs didn't stop there. Guess my face was very animated last night, (honest, I wasn't even trying) and it kept the gals laughing. Perhaps that's why the youngster across from our table kept staring at me.
Darn my star quality......................hahaha!
The laughs didn't stop there. Guess my face was very animated last night, (honest, I wasn't even trying) and it kept the gals laughing. Perhaps that's why the youngster across from our table kept staring at me.
Darn my star quality......................hahaha!
Thursday, September 25, 2008
A Giggle Fest
Just when you think your kids aren't listening, they surprise you. For those of you who don't know me very well, I love to laugh. The only problem with my laughter is that once I get going, I'm helpless. It's not always easy for me to snap out of my laugh attack. Today was no exception.
I was reading a new book to my classroom called "Operation: Dump the Chump". Just the name of the story gets my kids giggly. It's a story about a boy who wants to get rid of his younger brother for a whole summer because he is constantly driving him nuts-o. During oral reading today, I came to a part of the story that once again drove my students to burst into giggles, which led ME to a near fit of giggles. And guess what the topic of the story was at that point? Yep, underwear. (See story FRUIT of the LOOM)
The older brother in the story has absolutely had it with his brother and has decided to set a plan into motion that will get his brother shipped off for the summer. Oscar lists many reasons why he is ready to "dump the chump" and secretly begins the start to his operation.
At one point he begins to explain about a time when his brother made him so mad, he took off running outside to chase him down and pummel him good. His younger brother Robbie had been peeping in his window while he tried on his new underwear as he was sporting his new look in front of the mirror. (enter the children's giggles) Robbie let out a "va-va-va-voom" followed by a whistle, and that was the last straw for Oscar. He finally gets outside and clobbered his brother good, which made his brother wail, which in turn brought the next door neighbors out. At that point, Oscar finally realized he was still wearing his underwear.
And the story continues: (excerpt from the book)
---I was so embarrassed, I didn't know what to do. And neither did the Farley's. So we all just stood there staring at each other.
Finally I just kind of waved at them and said, "Hi there, Mr. and Mrs. Farley. How do you like my new underwear?"
Mrs. Farley didn't answer. She just shook her head real disgustedly and walked back to her house. But Mr. Farley took a few steps in my direction and put his hands on his hips. "For heavens sake, Oscar," he said. "Don't you think you're rather old to be running around the neighborhood in your panties?"
Panties! The guy actually called my underwear panties! I've never really forgiven Mr. Farley for that.---
As I was reading that portion, I didn't really think the kids were listening THAT well to what was going on, but oh how wrong I was. They burst into a fit of giggles over that part and I couldn't help but laugh too. The nerve of that man calling his underwear panties! Heaven forbid, hahaha. (At least that's what the kids were thinking.) Just the fact that they were laughing wanted to make ME laugh! You have no idea how hard it is for me to continue reading when my face is breaking into a huge smile. It's tough trying to force words through my lips when a grin is being stretched from ear to ear. I feel like Elast-a-girl. I tried to muster through it as best I could and regain my composure so I could continue................a silly story indeed,but oh so entertaining for the kids.
There's no possible way you can just breeze through that passage without cracking a grin. I just can't help it though, the kids are glued to my every word. Darn my dramatic flair.
I was reading a new book to my classroom called "Operation: Dump the Chump". Just the name of the story gets my kids giggly. It's a story about a boy who wants to get rid of his younger brother for a whole summer because he is constantly driving him nuts-o. During oral reading today, I came to a part of the story that once again drove my students to burst into giggles, which led ME to a near fit of giggles. And guess what the topic of the story was at that point? Yep, underwear. (See story FRUIT of the LOOM)
The older brother in the story has absolutely had it with his brother and has decided to set a plan into motion that will get his brother shipped off for the summer. Oscar lists many reasons why he is ready to "dump the chump" and secretly begins the start to his operation.
At one point he begins to explain about a time when his brother made him so mad, he took off running outside to chase him down and pummel him good. His younger brother Robbie had been peeping in his window while he tried on his new underwear as he was sporting his new look in front of the mirror. (enter the children's giggles) Robbie let out a "va-va-va-voom" followed by a whistle, and that was the last straw for Oscar. He finally gets outside and clobbered his brother good, which made his brother wail, which in turn brought the next door neighbors out. At that point, Oscar finally realized he was still wearing his underwear.
And the story continues: (excerpt from the book)
---I was so embarrassed, I didn't know what to do. And neither did the Farley's. So we all just stood there staring at each other.
Finally I just kind of waved at them and said, "Hi there, Mr. and Mrs. Farley. How do you like my new underwear?"
Mrs. Farley didn't answer. She just shook her head real disgustedly and walked back to her house. But Mr. Farley took a few steps in my direction and put his hands on his hips. "For heavens sake, Oscar," he said. "Don't you think you're rather old to be running around the neighborhood in your panties?"
Panties! The guy actually called my underwear panties! I've never really forgiven Mr. Farley for that.---
As I was reading that portion, I didn't really think the kids were listening THAT well to what was going on, but oh how wrong I was. They burst into a fit of giggles over that part and I couldn't help but laugh too. The nerve of that man calling his underwear panties! Heaven forbid, hahaha. (At least that's what the kids were thinking.) Just the fact that they were laughing wanted to make ME laugh! You have no idea how hard it is for me to continue reading when my face is breaking into a huge smile. It's tough trying to force words through my lips when a grin is being stretched from ear to ear. I feel like Elast-a-girl. I tried to muster through it as best I could and regain my composure so I could continue................a silly story indeed,but oh so entertaining for the kids.
There's no possible way you can just breeze through that passage without cracking a grin. I just can't help it though, the kids are glued to my every word. Darn my dramatic flair.
Tuesday, September 23, 2008
"This....this......"
I was out front watering my garden yesterday with my two lil cousins shadowing me. As I was moving the water from one bed to the next, I heard the lil 3 year old repeating, "This...this...." behind me and I didn't know WHAT he was talking about. I turned around and saw that he held something dark brown between his two fingers and my first thought was that it was a dried flower bud. I leaned down for a closer look and noticed it was no flower bud. Indeed. It was a dried bird mess that was coiled like a little cinnamon roll. Chaaaaa!
I immediately told him to put it down---YUCKY. However, I couldn't help but turn around and laugh at his innocence. Where as I see a bird poop, he sees a neat little brown shape that needs a closer inspection. Never a dull moment!
And no worries, we came inside and washed our hands with lots of soap.
I immediately told him to put it down---YUCKY. However, I couldn't help but turn around and laugh at his innocence. Where as I see a bird poop, he sees a neat little brown shape that needs a closer inspection. Never a dull moment!
And no worries, we came inside and washed our hands with lots of soap.
Be Careful What You Wish For
Last night I was so fired up as I took the trash out and I learned that I really should be careful what I wish for.
Before I took the trash out, I had been making my bed but was having a terrible time trying to get the mattress pad on the bad. I would get one corner on and move around the bed to do the next corner when the opposite corner would pop off! I was about to lose it.........
Anywho, after I finally finished making my bed, I went plowing outside to dump the trash, and as I was fired up about the bed giving me fits, I said to myself, "If I see a cockroach loitering out here (as we have for the past few nights) I'm liable to kill it right on the spot." As I dumped the trash around the side of the house I thought nothing of my words UNTIL I made it back to the front porch. There standing between me and the front door was a big cockroach with his WINGS popped up. SICK! I felt like saying---why tonight, but then I remembered that I practically asked for it. Cockroaches are so skittish though and they make me nervous when I'm trying to kill them. If only I'd had my shoes on.........
I decided to rise to the occasion, seems how I practically asked for it, and grabbed the closest thing I could find to squish it. I snatched a log from the wood pile and for a split second I felt paralyzed with fear. I didn't want to get to close for fear that at any second he would launch himself at my legs. So, as I didn't want to get too close I decided to throw the log at him and just hoped that it would land on top of him. It didn't. The roach went scurrying off to the side of the porch and I grabbed another log from the pile and tried to smack him as he climbed up the brick wall. That definitely got him running, but after a few good whacks I finally squished him for good.
As I came into the house, my dad asked me a few minutes later what I'd been doing because he heard me clacking the wood around on the front porch and I dramatically told him how I took down the roach. He replied back with, "Oh, I thought you were getting wood ready for a fire." Pahhhhhhh! As if! Needless to say, it's time to spray.
Before I took the trash out, I had been making my bed but was having a terrible time trying to get the mattress pad on the bad. I would get one corner on and move around the bed to do the next corner when the opposite corner would pop off! I was about to lose it.........
Anywho, after I finally finished making my bed, I went plowing outside to dump the trash, and as I was fired up about the bed giving me fits, I said to myself, "If I see a cockroach loitering out here (as we have for the past few nights) I'm liable to kill it right on the spot." As I dumped the trash around the side of the house I thought nothing of my words UNTIL I made it back to the front porch. There standing between me and the front door was a big cockroach with his WINGS popped up. SICK! I felt like saying---why tonight, but then I remembered that I practically asked for it. Cockroaches are so skittish though and they make me nervous when I'm trying to kill them. If only I'd had my shoes on.........
I decided to rise to the occasion, seems how I practically asked for it, and grabbed the closest thing I could find to squish it. I snatched a log from the wood pile and for a split second I felt paralyzed with fear. I didn't want to get to close for fear that at any second he would launch himself at my legs. So, as I didn't want to get too close I decided to throw the log at him and just hoped that it would land on top of him. It didn't. The roach went scurrying off to the side of the porch and I grabbed another log from the pile and tried to smack him as he climbed up the brick wall. That definitely got him running, but after a few good whacks I finally squished him for good.
As I came into the house, my dad asked me a few minutes later what I'd been doing because he heard me clacking the wood around on the front porch and I dramatically told him how I took down the roach. He replied back with, "Oh, I thought you were getting wood ready for a fire." Pahhhhhhh! As if! Needless to say, it's time to spray.
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
Marriage & Love
Kids are SO funny!
During school today, one of my boy students came up to me with a question. He and another student had been looking at some classroom yearbooks from the previous years at this school and there were some questions printed in the back of the book that he wasn't too sure about. He came up to me with a furrowed brow and asked me what the phrase meant. It read: My Future---My family will consist of.........
As he looked at me with confusion written all over his face I explained to him that they were questions regarding his future, sort of like a wish list. I told him that he could write about what he wants his future family to consist of. Do you want to be married with a wife, how many kids do you want to have, and how many pets you want, etc. I think the "marriage" and "wife" word did the most damage. After explaining what the question meant, he quietly walked back to his seat. I followed him nonchalantly back to his seat, just in time to hear him say to her (in a VERY serious voice), "Do NOT answer this." He looked so grossed out and disgusted with that question and I so wanted to laugh out loud at his response! The girl quickly turned her yearbook to the same page so she could see what he was talking about. Guess these 8 year olds are still at the age where they get embarrassed about marriage and love.
Bless his little heart. Someday he'll grow out of that........hahaha!
During school today, one of my boy students came up to me with a question. He and another student had been looking at some classroom yearbooks from the previous years at this school and there were some questions printed in the back of the book that he wasn't too sure about. He came up to me with a furrowed brow and asked me what the phrase meant. It read: My Future---My family will consist of.........
As he looked at me with confusion written all over his face I explained to him that they were questions regarding his future, sort of like a wish list. I told him that he could write about what he wants his future family to consist of. Do you want to be married with a wife, how many kids do you want to have, and how many pets you want, etc. I think the "marriage" and "wife" word did the most damage. After explaining what the question meant, he quietly walked back to his seat. I followed him nonchalantly back to his seat, just in time to hear him say to her (in a VERY serious voice), "Do NOT answer this." He looked so grossed out and disgusted with that question and I so wanted to laugh out loud at his response! The girl quickly turned her yearbook to the same page so she could see what he was talking about. Guess these 8 year olds are still at the age where they get embarrassed about marriage and love.
Bless his little heart. Someday he'll grow out of that........hahaha!
Monday, September 15, 2008
Powering Down
I'm pathetic, I know. I've had the same cell phone for nearly 5 years. Time for an upgrade, right? I'd have to agree.
Last night I was talking on the phone when I heard a beeping in my ear. I pulled the phone away and noticed that the battery was getting low. No big deal. I ignored it for a few minutes but after the phone continued beeping I decided it was time to plug it into the charger. I figured the phone would begin to charge so I carried on with my conversation, despite the warning beeps that continued to fill my ear. On a sidenote, let me just say that I am surprised as anyone that my battery is still kicking. Everyday I wonder if this is going to be the day my phone dies.
After a few more minutes passed by, my phone began a quick repetition of loud beeps in my ear and the screen then read "Powering Down Now". I have never seen my phone completely drained like that and for one sad moment I thought this was it. My phone shut off and all that was left was a black screen staring back at me. I think I was in shock. I couldn't understand why it shutdown since I had it plugged into the charger. I stood there leaning over my bed, staring at my phone, with such a sad look on my face. I thought it had completely died, the battery was dead, no life, zilch-o. THEN, I realized that the phone charger wasn't clicked all the way into the phone. Who's the space case?! As soon as I realized THAT was the problem, I popped the charger in all the way and the phone immediately started charging.
Why.......why.......................WHY??? hahaha
Last night I was talking on the phone when I heard a beeping in my ear. I pulled the phone away and noticed that the battery was getting low. No big deal. I ignored it for a few minutes but after the phone continued beeping I decided it was time to plug it into the charger. I figured the phone would begin to charge so I carried on with my conversation, despite the warning beeps that continued to fill my ear. On a sidenote, let me just say that I am surprised as anyone that my battery is still kicking. Everyday I wonder if this is going to be the day my phone dies.
After a few more minutes passed by, my phone began a quick repetition of loud beeps in my ear and the screen then read "Powering Down Now". I have never seen my phone completely drained like that and for one sad moment I thought this was it. My phone shut off and all that was left was a black screen staring back at me. I think I was in shock. I couldn't understand why it shutdown since I had it plugged into the charger. I stood there leaning over my bed, staring at my phone, with such a sad look on my face. I thought it had completely died, the battery was dead, no life, zilch-o. THEN, I realized that the phone charger wasn't clicked all the way into the phone. Who's the space case?! As soon as I realized THAT was the problem, I popped the charger in all the way and the phone immediately started charging.
Why.......why.......................WHY??? hahaha
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