What was that?!

The other day, my dad and I were trimming one of the front trees. Well I SHOULD probably clarify, HE was trimming and I was watching. My job consisted of occasionally holding the ladder and admiring his work.

While he was trimming away like a wild man, I was standing on the sidewalk in a daze when the following conversation played out:

Dad: "WHAT was that?!"
Me: "What?" (clearly confused)
Dad: "Something just fell out of the tree."
Me: "What........? Are you sure? I didn't see anything."
Dad: "Ya, something came falling down right at my face! I think it was a bird."
Me: "A bird?!"
Dad: "I think so."
Me: "Did you just chop a bird in half?!"
Dad: "I don't know........"
(he and I are then scouring the ground looking through the fallen leaves and branches for something that resembles a bird)
Me: "Pahhhhhh! There it is. Looks like a piece of paper to me."
Dad: "Man........it happened so fast I couldn't tell what it was."
Me: "Happens to the best of us, hahaha."

Catastrophe avoided, back to work.

Personal Lint Trap

I was getting ready for my shower this evening when I looked down and noticed my belly button. You know, that lil' indent of a hole right in the middle of your tummy...........ringing a bell? By the sight of it I could tell I had neglected it for too long. I was rather appalled at what was hanging out in there.

I'm embarrassed to say that I saw little white "fuzzies", but it's the truth. I shower and clean myself everyday, but somehow the belly button gets thrown to the sidelines. Guess it was time for a deep scrub. How often do we overlook our belly buttons?! For real. The first thing that came to mind was a lint trap. It's our very own, built in, one size doesn't always fit all, personal lint trap.

Time to clean house.

Living a Lifetime Movie

That's exactly what I did last night in my dream.

I was wrongfully imprisoned and had my baby there as well. While out in the prison yard one day, the guards called out for everyone on the ground. As my group and I did so, wondering what was going on, a male prisoner came running over to us and stuck me with a needle and then he dropped his syringes by my side making me look like the guilty one. I was hauled off and placed in isolation. No one believed me, but one woman. I was placed in a new unit so I could still hold my baby through a plastic wall and gloved hands. The tears were real. I was taken out of prison for a day to visit my parents ranch, my roots, and the tears came rushing back after looking at the rolling hills that surrounded us. My mother knew I was innocent while my sister thought I was guilty and paid me no attention. Day by day, more people began to befriend me in prison and believe in me. I remained in isolation so the male prisoner that was soon to go on trial and had caused even more damage to my world, would not know what happened to me. As we got to his trial day, I came out the door as a witness to be used against him, and the whole courtroom was in shock that yes, I was still alive. And to end the movie on a good note, I was released from prison, taking my baby with me to the sprawling ranch where we had the chance to begin again. I was finally home.

NOW, just remember the characters were fictional in this dream, except for me and my mom. I KNOW my real sister would never turn her back on me, wink-wink. With all the drama and tears in that dream, I seriously woke up thinking, "Wow. I just lived a Lifetime Movie. I have GOT to tell my sister!"

Talk about a storyline for your movie. Where's a producer when you need one! Pahhhhh!

The Art of War

As I was watching my students today I noticed one in particular nonchalantly lean his arms back behind his head, as though he was stretching, and THEN with a flick of the wrist he flung a small chunk (which I can only assume was a piece of crayon) at a girl sitting across the table from him. I don't even think she noticed it as the crayon bounced off her tummy and onto the floor. First off, I had to bite back a laugh because it truly was too funny. So I swallowed my laugh and pasted a frown face with raised brows and said his name quietly. He looked at me with a little "oops, I got caught" grin and told me that it was "a war" with this particular girl as they have been doing this over the past few days. Hmmm........

The other day we had Art Masterpiece in our classroom and the children were sitting on the floor in groups. As I moved between two particular groups, I noticed some little crayon chunks flying across the floor out of the corner of my eye. I couldn't tell who the culprit was, but I had to bite back a laugh while it was going on. Two students were having a little "war" with one another and I just wasn't in the right spot at the right time to see who it was. I would throw a glance around the room and give students "the eye" in hopes of forcing a confession, but I got nowhere. Now I have a pretty good idea who was working the floor behind my back.

It's something that should NOT want to make me giggle, but IT DOES! I know, it's terrible, but I find it too funny. Probably because my friends and I would try the same things. It's bringing it all back.......

Boys, Boys, Boys

Why do boys feel it is necessary to lean out their windows, wave their arms wildly, and yell meaningless words in an attempt to attract a girls attention?

A group of boys, who looked to be high schoolers, pulled up next to me at a red light the other day and despite the fact that we were a cars length away it didn't stop them from attempting to gain my attention. Well, they got it. I heard the commotion outside my lowered window and I thought to myself, "What is going on?!" And of course, being the curious person I am, I turned my head and peered to the left. BAM---fuel to the fire I tell ya. Mistake #1- looking in the first place. Mistake #2- looking twice. Mistake #3- giving them a smile.

DESPITE the fact that it was a pity smile and NOT a full fledged smile, they pulled away thinking they were the sauce and congratulating themselves with a high 5 and a slap on the back. What morons. If only they knew they looked like a barrel of monkeys on wheels.

What if the roles were reversed. How would they like it?! (Probably a little too much. Scratch that thought.)

The Scooter Store

I received a piece of mail today from the Scooter Store. YES, the Scooter Store. The infomercials that you always see on TV were now brought to life at my front door. Pictures of senior citizens buzzing around town on their brand new scooters stared back at me. At first my reaction was, "WHAT is this?" Then it moved on to thoughts of how they must have gotten the wrong address, but low and behold there was my name posted in bold print on the mailer.

I know I have a birthday coming up but I haven't aged THAT much in the last year.

I didn't think it was very funny.

"THEY need cable........."

Those were the first words out of my sisters mouth when we walked past a couple of rambunctious canines and their owners last weekend. The man tried to control his two large dogs while his lady friend looked on in wide eyed fear. Their dogs lunged at Bella (my sisters dog) as we attempted to walk by them in the bike lane. Poor Bella didn't know which way to turn and my sister quickly made her stop and sit until she calmed down.

As our energy had just sky-rocketed, I cast a glance in my sisters direction and wound up catching her eye. She looked.........a little "miffed". :o) That's when she popped out with, "THEY need cable." Pahhhhh! I wanted to laugh..........in fact, I did. We both did! My sister went on to say, "Apparently that couple has never seen the Dog Whisperer, otherwise they would have corrected their dogs behavior." (He's on the Nat. Geo. channel)

I couldn't help but smile as we moved on and coasted back into our walking rhythm. They need cable..........indeed, hahaha!

Changing the world, one dog at a time.